No two children are the same - everyone knows this. Some can easily approach other children and get to know them, they really like to make friends and play with others, but there are children who feel embarrassed to go up and talk with another child; they will stand aside and watch, because their shyness doesn’t allow them to take the first step.
Parents of children who behave shyly, start to worry when they see that their child prefers to stand on the periphery. Of course, every parent wants their child to be able to find a common language with other children in the group or playground, and be sociable.
So what should parents do? What parental help can they give to their shy child? Let's figure it out!
Some children can adapt very quickly to any changes that occur in their lives. But, we also need to remember that some children are very vulnerable, even to ordinary situations. As a result, the child can produce a protective reaction which manifests as shyness.
There are several reasons why children are shy:
- If a child’s parents or possibly their grandparents are shy, then it is likely that it will be passed on to their child. It has been proven by scientists who are engaged in genetics and hereditary research.
- It can happen when a child has not had enough parental love, care and affection, when parents behave too severely or sometimes even cruelly. Children in this situation can quickly become isolated in an attempt to not attract attention to themselves.
- Children from birth learn to adapt to something new. They learn to hold up their head, sit, crawl, walk, go to kindergarten, and then to school. Always and everywhere they need to go through a period of adaption.
When a child begins to get used to something new- their character, and both positive and negative features start to establish themselves. A child becomes indecisive and shy, if at some point their adaption was unsuccessful.
- There are children who are hyper-patronized by their parents. Such children cannot learn to be independent. Also, if mum and dad demand too much from their child, then this gives rise to an inferiority complex and creates shyness in them.
Some parents incorrectly think that if their child is shy it is nothing to worry about.
For these children, it is difficult to feel comfortable in many social situations. They do not know how to build a positive relationship with other children. They step back and are always afraid of something.
How can you help your child overcome their shyness?
Mum and dad are the most important people in a child’s life. It is first from their parents that children take an example. It is absolutely necessary to help your child overcome these feelings of shyness and self-doubt, as this is not a personality trait, but a pathology.
If you notice that your child has some of the characteristics that we have discussed in this article, then you must first show by your own example how to behave. After all, children copy adult behavior. Do not forget about such qualities as justice, attentiveness and care. If you suddenly make a mistake, correct your mistake.
If the child feels awkward with the children who attend a kindergarten group with them, you can invite the children to visit your home, because at home your child will feel more confident and calm. Always support them if they want to communicate with their peers. Go outside more often, visit playgrounds near to the kindergarten which you child will attend in the future. The sooner they begin to get used to the people that are around them, the easier it will be for them in the future.
Always support your children in every way possible. Get closer to them, let them feel your love, support and care. Do not force your child to be perfect. Speak about behavior in various situations.
Teach your child not to be afraid to express and defend their point of view.
Forget about screaming and swearing, all this will create a distance between you, and your child will isolate themselves. If you constantly try to nitpick with your child, this will only separate you more from each other.
Do not scold, and more importantly, never call them names. Try to remember how you behaved in your childhood.
Talk to your son or daughter more often. Show an interest in their interests, ask what new things happened during their day. Discuss their plans for the near future. If your child needs help or advice, then do not delay, offer assistance immediately. In this way they will feel that they are needed and loved and they can always rely on you to help. Praise the child, even for small victories.