Boys and girls need to be praised differently.
Some parents believe that a child should be praised, others, on the contrary, believe that it is not necessary and this will only spoil them. Children must be praised. But, this should be fair and deserved. Not every parent knows that girls and boys need to be praised differently. In this article, we propose to figure out how to compliment properly and for what exactly you need to praise boys and girls.
Let's start with the girls. Every mother and father want their daughter to be happy and tries to invest the best they have in their girl’s upbringing. If you want to achieve this, the girl needs to be praised more often, and it’s best to do it every day.
The most important difference between the praise of girls and the praise of boys is that girls should be praised not for their actions, but for no reason in particular. Parents should inform the girl that she is already good, the way she is, and to earn someone's love, she does not need to prove anything. The girl needs to be herself. This will form a healthy female psyche in the future. This is necessary so that when she grows older, she knows her worth, has a sense of self-dignity and has no complexes about her appearance. If the girl is praised for something, then she will form a belief that praise needs to be earned and there is nothing to praise her for as she is and that love needs to be earned.
Do not be afraid to praise the child, with time she will understand her capabilities, and self-esteem will align.
What words to speak to a girl in praise?
You are the most beautiful girl! You are the best girl! You are my sun! You're my princess!
Do not use such phrases like the following: “How clever you are, how much your mom or dad love you when you clean or tidy up your room”. If you want to appreciate it, it is better to do it neutrally: “I am very glad that your room is so clean!”. Do not connect your praise to things she does immediately. Say that your girl is the best just the way she is.
How to praise the boy?
Boys are the opposite. They have a different psyche. It is often found that many mothers and fathers say such phrases to their sons: “You are such a good boy! You are so clever! You are my darling!” In fact, they can contribute to the complete degradation of masculine qualities in this boy. The child starts to believe that he is good just the way he is. For a future man praise will only be good, when he achieves something. According to this it is necessary to make a certain conclusion. To encourage the boy to grow and find happiness in his adult life, we need to talk about his merits and deeds. For example: “You built a great castle from the Lego. You are very skillful with your tools.”
For a boy, tender words are less needed than a girl. Because the boy must evolve naturally to achieve different goals. He needs praise only if he has achieved something.
For boys it is very important and more precious that you show a train to guests that he built by himself from Lego. It is much more important than to call the boy a sun, bunny, fish or sweetie. A man’s psyche is satisfied when he sets a goal and reaches it. So boys need to be praised and encouraged for their actions.
You should notice and mark only those tasks that a boy has solved. For example: "You helped to bring me a heavy bag, without you I would not have coped!" He should have a desire to be needed, that without him someone cannot cope, of course all should be without coercion. That is what drives men. Mark the way your boy has matured, learned how to tie his shoelaces or button his jacket, etc. Boys definitely need to be shown that their actions are significant, and therefore he is worth something and likes himself.
Definitely, your love for your child must be present. Never say such phrases to him as: “I don’t need a boy who doesn’t help his mother or does not share with others.” Parents should encourage their boy to become better. Especially when you admire his merits in front of other people.
To summarize, the praise of mum and dad is very necessary and important for girls and boys. Build on your praise with kisses, hugs, and smiles. Let the child know that you love them very much, that they are always under your protection.